You know how, where, and how much it takes to make things happen quickly—every year, partners become more effective with each other. But you don’t always have to be… you know, effective. Sometimes you need to try something new. If you’ve already tried the “naked twister,” here are some more ideas for a languid evening.
Sex timer
If you and your partner don’t usually focus on foreplay and prefer to move straight to the main course, you’ll be surprised by the effect of switching up your priorities. Increase the time of foreplay, set a timer for a specific amount of time so you can savor every touch, every kiss. Don’t move on to penetration until the alarm goes off. And maybe even then you won’t want penetration, but rather just want to pleasure your partner with your hands. Or just kissing.
Anything
You won’t believe how many things in your home can be adapted for erotic play. See for yourself. Place your partner on the bed, and stand behind them. Pick up any object that catches your eye (a book, a comb, a jar of cream) and ask, “Is this it?” Your partner must decide yes or no. Once they answer, blindfold them and begin caressing them with the chosen object. You’ll see how you’ll quickly come up with countless ways to give pleasure using just the tools at hand. A simple massage is ideal for spanking, an ice cube from the refrigerator can be used to touch the nipples, and a pillow can be placed under the hips to lift the buttocks. Basically, it’s all up to your imagination.
Give up control
It’s normal to enjoy being in control, but if you want to establish a deeper, more trusting relationship, swap the “pleasure remote.” Hand over your favorite sex toy to your partner and, without touching it or them, tell them how you enjoy touching yourself. Or you can try it out yourself and show them that your vibrator isn’t the enemy of your sex life, but rather a friend.
Erotic reading
A game inspired by poker face from American TV series can be both fun and exciting. The idea is to engage in mundane activities like reading a book while simultaneously having fun. The game is “two-way,” meaning you can switch sides after the first round.
The rules are simple: one reads a book, and the other performs cunnilingus! You need to read with feeling, with purpose, with deliberation… That is, with expression, like in fifth-grade literature class. The more expressively you read, the more enjoyable it will be to switch places.
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